Bedroom cleaning checklist

In my last post I told you about how difficult it was to get J to clean his room. I also shared with you what J's ADHD Dr. suggested I try. I mentioned that he said to create a check list for J to refer to. ADHD children tend to be very visual learners. Check lists really help J and he does well with them.

I know what my idea of a check list is but I have heard from J that sometimes I make them TOO long. Or he doesn't exactly understand what I mean. So, off to the web I went. I entered in a few simple words, "easy bedroom check list for kids." Third listing down I found a great link. I highly recommend you take a look at it. Bedroom Cleaning for Kids One of the best ideas the article had was to label where things went. Example: Place a "Shirts" label on the shirt drawer of the dresser. Again, back to the visual ques.

With these recommendations in mind I created a simple checklist.

Example:

[   ] All trash picked up
[   ] All bedding on the bed
[   ] All dirty clothes in the basket
[   ] All toys picked up
[   ] Book shelf is neat
[   ] Clothes are folded and put in the dresser neatly

I added a simple picture

And a colorful title to attract his attention. Let's face it, even adults hate looking a check lists. Let's make it fun to look at!

After that I printed out the check list and placed it in one of those plastic protector sheets. This will allow J to make a check with a dry erase marker that can be removed later. I then taped it close. J is sneaking and I can see him pulling the list out and it disappearing. Using 4 small Velcro squares I attached the list to his full length mirror where it would be easy for him to see and reach. Because the protective sheets are meant to go into a binder they have the 3 holes on the side. I took a piece of twine and attached it to one of the holes. Then I attached it to the dry erase marker with tape. 

And there I had it, affordable reusable checklist! lol Now, lets see if it will work.

Clean your bedroom!!!

I don't know how many other parents deal with the stress known as their ADHD'ers bedroom but it is a CONSTANT source of struggle for us.

Last week we went to J's ADHD dr and I asked him about this and explained how much of a fight it was. I explained that it usually ended in a major meltdown.

Here is what he suggested:

First off, make up a check list that he can see spelling out what you consider a clean room. Keep is age appropriate.

Tell him on Saturday morning that it is (whatever time it might be) and he has until 9am Monday morning to clean his room. That you will remind him only once a day that his room needs to be cleaned.

(After you make sure he understands what you have just told him go to the next step of your explanation.)

Next explain to him the he leaves for school at 7am (Whatever time he leaves) and that at 9am you will go in there and clean it how you expect it to be cleaned. Make him understand that at 9am he will NOT be there to protect all his little precious treasures.

This seemed to make an impact on J for a few minutes. I'll admit, he's room is still a disaster but I fully intend to get in there on Monday morning and prove to him I wasn't kidding. J's dr made it a point to stress the importance of following through. Mind you, I don't plan on throwing away the stuff that is really important to J. I just plan to hide it for a while to make an impact. Sometimes drastic situations need drastic measures take to clear them up.

Behavior Log Books

Today I want to talk about the value of Behavior Log books. They take time but they are worth their weight in gold.

I started a behavioral log book after I got pregnant with my second son. We all know how pregnant mommy brain can be. I simply couldn't remember all the things,in J's behavior, that I felt it was important for his ADHD dr to know. After looking online and speaking with his dr we decided that writing it down would be the best course of action. That was how J's behavior log began.

As you can see, from the picture, I used a simple composition book from the dollar store.

Next I write the day and date. Because I have some quiet time mid morning I break J's log book daily entry into two sections. I write a quick summery of how the morning went. After that, I list all the pros of the morning. I do this to remind me to see the good in his behavior. Even if its not much its still there and I don't get lost in all the bad. I then list all the cons of the morning. It is my hope that the pros will outweigh the cons but it gives me a clear idea of where we're at.

My morning entry normally doesn't take more than 10-15 minutes. Come night time I repeat the process with his behavior after school or the weekend. Even on J's worse days it has only taken me no more than 20 minutes to get the entry done.

In the 20 plus months I've been doing this life has gotten so much easier. I can now clearly tell J's dr and councilor what his active issues are and praise him for his good behavior because its no longer getting lost in the bad. It has also helped me clarify behaviors we need to put in J's Goal book to work on.

More importantly, J has come to like his behavior log book. He can read it to see what he's done right and what he needs to work on. He has brought it to me and asked to talk about a behavior written in it. It has opened a line of communication between us because I make it a point, when I'm writing, to not make it ever sound like I'm attacking him. It's just a simple statement of the behavior.

I can not stress how wonderful J's Behavioral Log has been for us. It has given us clear guidance when everything else may be going crazy. The dr and councilor love his log book because I have it right there with us at the appointment. They know exactly what J's been up to.

If you have any question please feel free to leave your question in the comment box and I'll do my best to answer it.

Tackling One Problem at a Time

Three years ago I was given some very good advice from a close friend who had a special needs child. She said, "Cory, there will be a lot of little behavioral habits develop you wont like. Work on them one at a time. Admit to yourself that you can't tackle them all at once. They didn't start all at once. Don't wear yourself out trying to deal with them all at the same time." By now, most of us have figured out ADHD is a long haul trip.

Great advice but advice that got lost in the early stages of dealing with J's ADHD. Fast forward three years, it has come back to mind. J has developed several behaviors I do not like. Mainly, talking back, arguing, and temper tantrums. I have been wearing myself out, as well as everyone in my house, trying to deal with all of these at once. No more! Not after the horrendous day we had yesterday.

Having made this commitment I ran to the store and bought a note book to write our weekly/bi weekly goals down so that we can read over them every day.

This first week I am going to tackle the way J talks to people, mainly adults within the house.

Our goal: Be able to think about how his voice sound before/while he speaks.

Questions J can ask himself before/while he is speaking:
1. Does it sound rude/have attitude?
2. Does it sound angry?
3. Are you yelling?

If he says yes to any of these questions here are step he can take to fix it.

1. If it sounds rude/has attitude try restating it with please/thank you. Change your tone. Leave the attitude out of your voice. If it sounds rude or mean to you then it probably does to the person you are talking to.

2. If it sounds angry calm down before you say anything else. If you have to leave for a while, excuse yourself but let them know you will come back once you have calmed down. Once you have calmed down come back and talk to the person. Remember, things said in anger can't be taken back.

3. If you are yelling, stop. People don't listen when you yell. Walk away and come back after you have calmed down.


I have done my best to try and keep the wording simple and as short as I can. As most of you know, kids having an ADHD meltdown don't listen to what you are saying. I don't recommend trying to go over this during a meltdown. Ride the meltdown out and address whatever goal you are working on after the child has calmed down. I hope this helps.

Welcome!!!

I wanted to introduce everyone from our Facebook page to our very own blog! This will be where we can go far more in depth into conversations that we would be able to on Facebook. I can also share more of my day and things that are going on with J. Things that we're trying. Things that didn't work, that did work, or may think about trying.

I will also be looking for co authors from time to time so please let me know if you might be interested in writing with me. Thanks everyone!! ~ Cory